Friday, September 25, 2009
Sunday, September 20, 2009
(yes I have a couple :P )
If you need a good laugh, try reading through these children's science exam answers...
Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
Q: Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists.
Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.
Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? (Brilliant, love this!)
A: Keep it in the cow.
Q: What causes the tides in the oceans?
A: The tides are a fight between the Earth and the Moon. All water tends to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and nature hates a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins in this fight.
Q: What are steroids?
A: Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs.
Q: What happens to your body as you age?
A: When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental
Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
A: He says good-bye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. (The kid gets an A+ for this answer!)
Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes.
A: Premature death.
Q: How are the main parts of the body categorized? ( e.G., abdomen)
A: The body is consisted into three parts -- the brainium, the borax and the abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain; the borax contains the heart and lungs, and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels A, E, I, O, and U.
Q: What is the fibula?
A: A small lie.
Q: What does 'varicose' mean? (I do love this one...)
Q: Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarian Section.'
A: The Caesarian Section is a district in
Q: What does the word 'benign' mean?'
A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.
Friday, September 18, 2009
The latest headline from Newsweek magazine. I was floored when I saw the title. Like we don't have enough people screaming about this, now they claim your baby judges people on the color of their skin as early as 6 months old. Don't we, as a collective society, have more than enough to deal with right now, than to worry about how an infant judges someone???? Like how the government is trampling the Constitution of the United States. Or how a majority of politicians are more corrupt then the criminals sitting in prison right now? Or how about that national healthcare bill they are trying to shove down our throats. Or maybe that bailout of billions upon billions of dollars that was suppose to some how rejuvenate the now crippled economy. Nahhhhhhhhhh, let's worry about how 6 month old babies relate to someone. That is so much more important.
The full article can be found here .
(wanders off mumbling ...................where the heck did Wyatt put that duct tape)
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Monday, September 14, 2009
More can be found here
Friday, September 11, 2009
Like anyone will ever forget, where they were, or what they were doing. I was currently laid off from one job, and filling in at my part time job at the restaurant. I was heading to work that morning, when they came on the radio with the news. I actually had to fight with myself not to turn around and head back home. Once I got to work, I tried calling my family on my cell phone, but it wouldn't go through. We had the televisions going, so we saw exactly what was going on. There were a few customers in that morning, but they too were more interested in what was on the tv, then their breakfast. The only sound was the reporter and the live feed of the destruction, as it happened.
The Eagle Tear picture I am posting was created back then. I truly wish I knew who designed it, because I would love to give them full credit.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Sunday, September 6, 2009
Obama now wants to hire a contractor to monitor what is said concerning the govt on social networking sites like twitter, facebook and so forth. Like asking citizens to turn in dissenters on his health care bill wasn't enough.
The National Legal and Policy Center, or NLPC, revealed the White House New Media team is seeking to hire a technology vendor to collect data such as comments, tag lines, e-mail, audio and video from any place where the White House "maintains a presence" – for a period of up to eight years.
"The contractor shall provide the necessary services to capture, store, extract to approved formats, and transfer content published by EOP (Executive Office of the President) on publicly-accessible web sites, along with information posted by non-EOP persons on publicly-accessible web sites where the EOP offices under PRA (Presidential Records Act) maintains a presence," the posting states.
Full article can be found here.
So, freedom of speech is being carefully monitored (we knew that), and copyright laws are being trampled into the ground. Because as most people know or SHOULD know, you own the copyright to any picture you personally take. That includes video and audio (the law says so right there) IT IS YOURS. No one has the right to borrow/store or use it in the future, without your permission.
If the great and powerful Obamasiah wants to go on an all expense paid (for by the US citizens) fishing trip, he is going to need much better bait.
Friday, September 4, 2009
Momma Welfare Roll by Maya Angelou
Pudgy HANDS bunched on layered hips
Where bones idle under years of fatback
And lima beans.
Her jowls shiver in accusation
Of crimes cliched by Repetition.
Her children, strangers
To childhood's TOYS, play
Best the games of darkened doorways,
Rooftop tag, and know the slick feel of
Other people's property.
Too fat to whore,
Too mad to work,
Searches her dreams for the
Lucky sign and walks bare-handed
Into a den of bureaucrats for her portion.
'They don't give me welfare.
I take it.'