These Eight words the Rede fulfill: "An Ye Harm None, Do What Ye Will"
Sunday, May 17, 2009
captcha
Those wonderfully annoying codes you have to type in on most everything online nowadays, the captcha code. I had this one yesterday.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
Tools and their uses
A friend in chat posted some of these and gave me the link to the rest. I thought some of you would find them extremely funny.
DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.
WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, 'Oh SH-- '
ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age.
SKILL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.
PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.
BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.
HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.
TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.
HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.
BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.
TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.
The rest can be found here
DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.
WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light. Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, 'Oh SH-- '
ELECTRIC HAND DRILL: Normally used for spinning pop rivets in their holes until you die of old age.
SKILL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.
PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.
BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.
HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle. It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.
VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.
OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.
TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.
HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.
BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.
TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.
The rest can be found here
Friday, May 15, 2009
Friday
Looks like we might have a decent day or two this weekend, but if the weatherman is correct, next weekend may be even nicer. They are calling for high 70's by Thursday. I can NOT wait.
It was an interesting week at work, no, I didn't hear crickets this time. Just last minute stuff the boss "forgot" too add to the schedule, that had to be done before we left. I was in my usual place on the grinder, so I had to opportunity to watch the hilarity of everyone scrambling like little busy bees. Nice change. Usually by 1:00p.m. Thursday most everyone is on autopilot for the weekend. This time, I was way ahead on material, so I took it easy the whole day. If the boss had come back and checked I'm sure she would have moved me to another area, instead I spent the day looking busy doing nothing much. I only ground up 1600 pounds of scrap. (slacking I know) The normal rate for a day is between 2000-2300 pounds.
Enjoy the weekend everyone.
It was an interesting week at work, no, I didn't hear crickets this time. Just last minute stuff the boss "forgot" too add to the schedule, that had to be done before we left. I was in my usual place on the grinder, so I had to opportunity to watch the hilarity of everyone scrambling like little busy bees. Nice change. Usually by 1:00p.m. Thursday most everyone is on autopilot for the weekend. This time, I was way ahead on material, so I took it easy the whole day. If the boss had come back and checked I'm sure she would have moved me to another area, instead I spent the day looking busy doing nothing much. I only ground up 1600 pounds of scrap. (slacking I know) The normal rate for a day is between 2000-2300 pounds.
Enjoy the weekend everyone.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
lolcat
Not that I would ever cause trouble, or even think about it (wanders off whistling innocently)
song of the week
It's been a while since I posted a song, and I feel this one really describes how many are living right now.
Monday, May 11, 2009
Geske sentenced to 80 years
About freaking time! I wrote about this drunk driver who totaled a car beyond recognition and killed two area teenagers, while driving in excess of 80 mph. I am glad to see justice is finally being served. The families of those kids (young adults) will never get them back, but at least this is one person who won't be killing anyone else.
The whole sentence can be found here.
The whole sentence can be found here.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
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